Bakker Bugle Blog Say it three times fast. In Luxembourgish.

31 March 2008

Another month, another trip

Filed under: travel — Anita @ 19:38

In March, we took advantage of the public holiday “season” (17 Mar – St. Paddy’s day, 21 Mar – Good Friday, 24 Mar – Easter Monday) to take a trip to Italy and France. We started in Venice (2 days), and then traveled between Venice and Milan, stopping in Vicenza and Verona. We spent one day in Milan and two days in the French Riviera: Nice and Monaco.

We’ve prepared most of the Venice photos and they are now available for your viewing pleasure. The Bugle staff is hard at work, culling the very best of the rest of approximately 6000 or so photos that we took in six days. Each town/day will have their own set eventually. We’ll post another update when the next set is ready.

Here’s your link: Photo collection for March trip

27 March 2008

Links regarding the News in Ireland

Filed under: ireland,links — Will @ 21:16

News in Ireland:

“Hotels here are to slash prices for Americans in a desperate attempt to entice high-spending tourists. The Irish Independent has learned that hotels in the West — who have been particularly hard hit by the weak dollar — are to offer rooms on an ‘euro-for-dollar’ rate.” Wow — a suite will be about €10 a night by the end of the summer. Not that anybody can ever undercut the B.B. B&B’s low, low, prices. They’d have to be crazy to be as cheap as the Bugle! With every stay, you get a free onion!
You heard it here first. By the way, Chilean Sea Bass is sooo pre-War-on-Terror.
Mahon Tribunal vs. Bertie Ahern, government’s leader
Okay, so this is a bit of a mess. Here’s what we know: (1) It’s been going on for years, and (2) Everyone involved earns contempt, but not outrage, from the public at large. The Bugle has two staff members devoted, full-time, to figuring out the historical references, people, banks, and legal processes involved. Here’s a sample vocabulary list: dig-out, sterling lodgement, building society account, PAYE. And if you don’t know the terms “Taoiseach” and “Teachta Dála” and how to pronounce them, you’re going to find Irish radio news very confusing. (Fortunately, ministers are simply called “ministers”.)

As I recall, there’s a lazy, insipid way to report on matters that one is too intellectually challenged to understand. I believe it’s called American journalism, i.e. “Reprint both sides’ press releases and let the consumer sort it out.” So here you go.

Oops, too late. One of the two staff just filed for an extended leave for mental health reasons. Dammit. We’ll keep looking for a “Mahon Tribunal for Dummies” — anybody want to do freelance work for the Bugle?

Minister for Education under criticism on several topics
When it comes to news regarding the lesser ministers in the Republic’s government, there appear to be two possibilities:

  • All the basements of the major newspapers are connected by tunnels to a Control Room. In that room, there is wheel resembling the big wheel on The Price Is Right, labeled with the names of each minor minister. Twice a year, the editors-in-chief of those newspapers meet in the Control Room, spin the big wheel, and then launch a simultaneous attack on the name that comes up. They start covering the press releases of the applicable political entities rather than throwing them away, publish weekly “special investigations,” and encourage their cousins to write scathing letters to the editor.
  • The government is shot through with corruption and incompetence.

Please note the words “appear to be” above. As you can see, the Bugle takes an open-minded approach to Irish politics. We commit to you, our readers, that we will never jump to a negative assessment of a political system that we do not fully understand. Also, our own editor-in-chief has a conflict of interest on this issue, given the Irish union’s involvement. So that’s all for now.

The Save Tara Campaign
Ireland, as a young and island nation, is always wary of dependence on foreign markets and institutions. So it fosters its own natural resources, including the all-important hippie-leftie-greenie crop. The Save Tara campaign currently brings together factions devoted to the environment, sustainability, anarchism, historical reenactment, or opposition to corporate power. Now that the campaign has become the subject of a celebrity squabble involving Bono, Americans might hear about it, once.
Columnist for Irish Independent publicises embarassing US lawmakers
Seriously, you people are making it hard to live abroad.
The Next Big Issue: The Queen’s Visit
Many organisations, including the British government, have been sending up test balloons on this one.

26 March 2008

Bugle P.I. returns after late-winter hiatus

Filed under: private eye — Will @ 15:15

Editor's note: Our American audience is probably accustomed to long breaks in narratives, given the recent television writers' strike. Nevertheless, I apologize for the long break from the last episode. If you'd like to review the story so far, then scroll down to click on "private eye" under the Categories heading.

I wanted to help Eddie in every way possible, I quizzed Dan, his lawyer, for about a hour. Dan kept my drink topped off. Good guy, that Dan. Smart, too. Still, I was worried that there would be some surprise on Friday that would leave Eddie in dire straits. Dan did all he could to prepare me and reassure Eddie.

The alcohol helped with the second part, if not the first. Eddie and I left Dan’s office with few cares beyond a slight buzz and a strong desire for a meal at Hot Doug’s Encased Meat Emporium.

By ten, Eddie and I were knocking back lovely, yellow, watery American beer at Tommy’s. Tommy’s Bar was a neighbourhood place in just the way that the Cubbie Bear wasn’t. The Lincoln Park kids wonder how this place stays open, and the answer comes straight from Tommy’s mouth if you ask: “Figure out how many beers you gotta sell in order to buy a television. We don’t have a television and I serve the guys that I like.”

My phone rang and I answered it without leaving my stool. Eddie’s face broke into a smile as soon as he heard the voice at the other end say, in a flat Chicago accent, “This is the Athlone Garda. Am I speaking to Will’s pants?” (more…)

24 March 2008

Forbidden Fruit-y Candy

Filed under: consumer,ireland — Will @ 18:58

Maynards Wine Gums have gaily coloured packaging that calls out to children and adults alike. B&B chose this candy due to the enigmatic word, “wine” — would the “gums” taste like the varieties of wine pictured on the package? Burgundy, sherry and port? Would such flavours be appealing in candy form?
maynardswine.png
As you can see in the second illustration (click on the image to zoom), the candies come in medley of shapes and colours. The shapes suggest distinct wine-like flavours, as mentioned above. The colours suggest the usual collection of gummy flavours — lemon, berry, orange and the like. The plot thickens.

Unfortunately, the appearance of Maynards Wine maynardgums.pngGums suggests far more complexity than the gums actually deliver. The flavours correspond to the colours, regardless of the shape and label. The typical colours are fairly tasty, but nothing special.

There is even the usual, very dark colour; you know, the unappealing gummy that nearly everyone avoids. It corresponds the only vaguely wine-like flavour. Rather than licorice, the dark coloured candies suggest a strong red wine that half-evaporated from sitting open on the kitchen counter.

So the name “Wine Gums” is mostly hype. Why “Wine”? I can’t say that the idea of wine flavoured candy was enticing so much as fascinating. Is this a cynical ploy to enthrall children by offering an adult transgression in kid-friendly form? When I see the little names of wine varietals, clearly chosen for their cultural cachet, I can only think of the candy cigarettes that I “smoked” at seven years old.

And then my mind asks the inevitable question: Is Maynards acting in the service of Big Grape? The inclusion of both “port” and “burgundy” suggests a cabal so wide that it stretches from the stuffiest French vineyards to the scrappy merchants of Portuguese fortified wine.

Back to the candies themselves. I’d rate the consistency and mouth-feel of the candies as a 3 on a 5-scale of gumminess. (For calibration: Haribo Gummy Bears are a 2 and Cadbury Swedish Fish are a 3.) The Maynards Wine Pastilles differ only in their coating of sugar crystals, which add little to the appeal of the confection.

In sum: Maynards Wine Gums are passable candy, but they simply cannot overcome the high expectations (and sinister lure) of their name and physical appearance.

Lisbon Photos: Go Flight!

Filed under: travel — Anita @ 18:14

We finally added titles, comments and tags to the photos from our trip to Lisbon in February. They are now ready for your perusal at the following webpage:

2313628291_e1e9b399e7.jpg
For maximum stress-reduction, we suggest that you spend one work-break per set, preferably with a warm drink.

17 March 2008

Saint Patrick’s Day 2008

Filed under: culture,entertainment,ireland — Will @ 9:49

Happy St Patrick’s Day!

To the begrudgers, March 17th is a day for worldwide paddywhackery, usually of the most stereotypical sort. (As opposed to paddywhackery of great subtlety, which is difficult to detect without being Irish yourself.)

Yesterday, we gave you an antidote to one St. Paddy’s cliché. Today, we give you another genuine Irishism:

Ah sure, it’ll be grand.

This versatile statement is a substitute for the blander American phrase, “Don’t worry about it.” The ideal circumstance for saying it today would be when it starts to rain on your parade.

It is pronounced with a practically undetectable insinuation of sarcasm. For months, I took it to be a cynical statement, but it is not. Mostly, it expresses an attitude — that the current situation is the best that we will ever get, regardless of what we deserve. With reference to situations of one’s own creation, the statement conveys confidence that things will end acceptably, no matter the contradictory, incomplete, or makeshift nature of arrangements.

If all this seems to be a negative portrayal of Irishness, then you’re probably American or British. Admit it, you too wish that you could so easily say, “Ah, feck it, let’s get a pint.” And if you could summon that strength of character, it would be grand, even if you didn’t put so much effort into turning your drinks green.

16 March 2008

Cowboy Candy

Filed under: consumer,ireland — Anita @ 22:37

Continuing our quest for becoming the best-in-class source for information about the Irish and British sugar- and syrup-oriented products, the BB Procurement Department obtained the second sample for 2008: Nestle’s Milkybar. milkybarthumb.png

The Milkybar is a thin, classic white chocolate bar. The Milkybar Kid on the wrapper, which is what first attracted the BB Procurement Department, is a pale blond kid, dressed in cowboy gear. He is suspiciously happy young man, but still strangely attractive.

On the surface, it wouldn’t appear to be much more than a white chocolatemilky-bar-kid.jpg version of a classic Hershey’s bar. However, the Milkybar has a bit of a hidden treat – each bar has a wild-west scene in the chocolate, with the Milkybar Kid doing some sort of wild-west activity.

Not only do you get creamy, sweet and lovely white chocolate, but you also get the surprise of what scene you will unwrap. As this gentleman noticed, the scenes can be quite interesting. The experience here at the BB is that the scenes are more routine and uninteresting.

The Milkybar has become a permanent addition to the BB Candy Stores, thereby showing our continued willingness to all candy, whether it be brown, white or even Turkish.

Happy St Patrick’s Eve

Filed under: culture,ireland — Will @ 16:04

We have two items from the interwebs to call to your attention, this day before the international celebration of Irishness.

First, we address the fake Irish idiom, “Top o’the Mornin”. As Seamus so perceptively commented, it is never said in Ireland without irony, at least in our experience.

The interweb’s smartest community, MetaFilter, offers the following American-style retort for those who are so ignorant as to further this offensive, Lucky-Charms stereotype: “And the rest of the day to yourself.” The genuine Irish usage of “yourself” makes it a real winner.

Second, we honour the best celebrations of St Patrick’s Day. By consensus of the Irish media and historical precedent, those take place in the USA. So we have a few links for your pleasure:

Finally, a St Paddy’s Day research project for our most enterprising readers: What is Gorey’s Saint Patrick’s Day parade? There is some controversy over its schedule. Another article, albeit in a regional paper, implies that it is the most prestigious parade in Ireland. Also, the following notice appeared in the Irish Independent on Wednesday, 5 March 2008:

IF YOU find you have a gap in your schedule this St. Patrick’s Day, due to Gorey’s parade being held on Sunday, March 16, then you might be inclined to join in the festivities in Arklow. Arklow’s St. Patrick’s Day parade will take place on Monday, March 17, and will kick off at 3 p.m.

The organising committee has said that participants in the Gorey parade are also welcome to take part in the Arklow parade.

My google-fu failed me on this one. I know that the Dublin parade is on Monday; we’ll be there!

10 March 2008

A key element of US culture: Fantasy Baseball

Filed under: entertainment,sports — Will @ 21:50

It’s time for fantasy baseball! My transatlantic relationship with American culture will change profoundly in the next week. Commenter Extraordinaire Dave runs the league, and my draft is Saturday.

I dubbed my team “The Dublin Felons” this year. [Previously “Irish Felons”, in error. — Ed.] Before you get the wrong idea: The name is a tribute to The Irish Felon, a newspaper that helped build the foundation for the Land War of the late 19th Century. Here’s an excerpt from the first issue (24 June 1848):

The transportation of a man, as a felon, for uttering sentiments held and professed by at least five-sixths of his countrymen, seemed to me so violent and so insulting a national wrong, that submission to it must be taken to signify incurable slavishness. The English Government, the proclaimed enemy of our nationality, had deliberately selected John Mitchel to wreck their vengeance upon him, as representative of the Irish nation. By indicting him for a ‘felony’ they virtually indicted five-sixths of the Irish people for ‘felony’. By sentencing him to fourteen years transportation to a penal settlement, they pronounced five-sixths of the Irish people guilty of a crime worthy of such punishment; and they declared that every individual of the six million of Irish Repealers who escapes a similar doom, escapes it not through right and law, but through the mercy or at the discretion of the English minister.
The audacity of our tyrants must be acknowledged. They occupy our country with military force, in our despite, making barracks of our very marts and colleges, as if to defy and challenge any manly pride that might linger among our youth. They pervert our police force into an organisation of street bullies, as if to drive all peace-loving industrious citizens into the ranks of disaffection. — John Martin

I expect each good son (or daughter) of Ireland to throw his (or her) match against The Irish Felons. Otherwise, may the curse of Molly Malone and her seven rotten children chase you so far beyond the seventh hill of damnation that the Lord himself won’t be able to see you with a telescope.

In addition, I plan to use my six-hour advantage every morning to great effect. So maybe I’ll even finish as well as 8th of 12 teams. I’m sure you have a thousand questions, so I’ll answer them in the comments.

9 March 2008

Required Reading for Ex-pats in Ireland

Filed under: B&B,culture,expat,ireland — Anita @ 20:43

Before we moved to Ireland, our good friend and frequent commentor Dave gave me a copy of The Lonely Planet’s Irish Language and Culture. The book, unlike a tourist guide, goes into lifestyle and society, sport, slang and entertainment.

For many months, I would read a little bit about Ireland before I went to bed. It helped give me insight into the Gaelic Games, helped me memorize the four provinces and the 32 counties. I also picked up several classic Irish phrases, included “You’re grand,” “No bother at all,” and “Jaysus!”.

Here’s a big thank you to Dave for the book. Now that Will and I have finished it, it will move to a place of honor in the guest room, so all our visitors can have the opportunity to learn just a little bit more about the country they are visiting.

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